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1) Mendapat Melaka seolah-olah meletakkan jari di Venice - kata-kata pedagang asing pada abad ke-15.

2) Pembinaan Kota A’ Famosa dibuat hasik pemusnahan tempat-tempat beribadat dan bangunan-bangunan yang menggambarkan Tamadun Melayu Melaka pada ketika itu.

3) Kita biarkan kaum Cina bangunkan ekonomi dan mendapat keuntungan lebih demi kepentingan negara. (Keuntungan ekonomi sepatutnya dibahagi mengikut nisbah penduduk)

4) 446 tahun Melaka dijajah. Bagaimana hendak mengubah minda rakyat kita yang masih dibelenggu oleh pengaruh mereka?

5) Mengapa orang Melayu pada pemerintahan British di Tanah Melayu tidak diberi peluang bekerja di ladang estet dan lombong bijih timah?

6) Konsep 1 Malaysia telah lama diamalkan di Sabah dan Sarawak.

7) Is it better to take sides or to just sit and watch?

8] A leader: Someone who can unite the whole nation but not his own family?

9) Personaliti adalah topeng. Kita pakai topeng yang berbeza mengikut situasi.

10) Undang-undang kita ada/cukup tetapi penguatkuasaan lemah.

11) Sampai bila kita hendak ajar rakyat kita kalau diikat tangan ke belakang dan disuap.

12) Pegawai PTD jangan jadi seperti burung kakak tua yang diajar bercakap.

13) What will happen in the younger generation if we, now make the wrong decision?

14) Fahami bahawa setiap dasar kerajaan yang dibuat sejak kemerdekaan adalah atas dasar perpaduan.

15) Berlaku salah tafsiran agama berdasarkan kepentingan individu atau politik kerana tidak faham agama.

16) Am I a terrorist? (Just because I am a Muslim)

17) Kenapa umat Islam menjadi penakut untuk pertahankan Islam?

18) 209 tahun Melaka tiada masjid sewaktu pemerintahan Portugis.

19) Masjid Kampung Hulu merupakan masjid pertama orang Islam di Melaka dibina oleh orang Arab.

20) Berpolitik mengikut undang-undang. Kepentingan negara melebihi segala-galanya.

21) Tanggungjawab kita untuk menyuarakan kebenaran. Tak kisah apa pun, yang penting buat.

22) Ilmu yang ada jika tidak dikongsi, tidak berguna.

23) Kasihan orang Melayu di negeri yang diperintah ‘pembangkang’.

24) Baca tentang Manuhara dengan Sultan Kelantan.

25) NS bakal dikuasai ‘pembangkang’ pada pilihanraya akan datang.

26) Rakyat yang tidak terdidik dengan undang-undang menjadi hakim dan mahkamah dalam kes-kes berprofil tinggi.

27) Rakyat yang pilih pemimpin. Apa keputusan pemimpin tanggung sendiri. (Merujuk kepada rakyat di negeri-negeri tertentu)

28) Terdapat perbezaan pada maksud ‘rakyat’ dan ‘warganegara’.

29) Kaum Melayu dikatakan kaum pendatang?

30) Hak istimewa orang Melayu di Singapura wujud dalam perlembagaan mereka.

31) Demonstrasi pertama orang Melayu adalah penentangan terhadap Malayan Union.

32) Nasib orang Islam di Selatan Thai, China dan tempat lain di dunia. Apa jadi?

33) Ketuanan Melayu perlu terus kekal. (Kerana itu sahaja yang kita ada sekarang, tak tahu lah selepas pilihanraya seterusnya akan lenyap)

34) Jangan jadi orang Melayu yang tidak ada agenda Melayu.

35) Lagu Warisan menyayat hati sampai ke hari ini.

36) Thank you to the older generation for providing us with ‘kesenangan’ today.

everything was worth it today..

despite having to just sit at home all day (siang) watching tv, reading novel, surf the net and sleep, its worth all of it!

my weekly routine of meeting him. my baby.

~sigh..

bahagianya.

even as i am missing him already.

love you.

obs/obml

diterjemah sebagai outward bound school atau outward bound malaysia lumut

ya, saya ke lumut perak minggu ini

baru balik kl 3 jam tadi

apa buat di sana?

kami berkayak mengelilingi pangkot laut

kami berwhaler (menaiki kapal yang boleh memuatkan 15-17 orang) dan berdayung (kadang2 bersail) mengelilingi pulau pangkor

kami berkhemah dua kali di tepi pantai

semuanya berlaku dalam masa 6 hari ini

ya, saya berOBS

dengan bangganya saya mengumumkan saya telah selesai dan tamat berkursus di sini

sekarang saya merupakan ex-bounders

update hari ni.

my bro’s flight was delayed. dia balik jumaat.

jumpa fu lunch kat masjid di putrajaya.

pas tu, jumpa kawan. helmy.

tengok teater dgn dia kat aswara.

lama tak tengok. best!

lepak dgn dia pun nice!

sampai umah around 12 plus.

nak gak online wpun dah lewat.

and update blog. itu sudah mesti.

dah janji. pas ni next week g obs, tak dapat online a week.

so belasah la skang.

pe lagi ek??

ohhh rindu. kat..

tanak la cakap.

bye.

woke up at 9am despite having nothing planned today. watch tv, had my bfast, basuh baju yang berlambak while trying to online.

tak dapat online until around 5pm. sucks! why tak dapat? dunno. dapat online pun sebab terfikir tok restart my vaio.

dush~

g lunch dgn kawan, nama terpaksa dirahsiakan, tapi dia dalam list (rujuk post sebelum-sebelum nih)

best a. seronok gak. i am naughty larrr…

balik umah around 4 plus. makan kopok lekor tok minum ptg, dua donut yg sangat2 sedap dan satu kuih yg ku lupa pulak daa namanya, aha pulut panggang!

kay. pas tu buka vaio and the rest is history.

makan dinner tadi pun depan vaio.

mandi dan solat kena dipaksa. tu pun dekat2 waktu nak habis baru buat. paham2 je la.

addicted.

pas tu, check gff (girl friend forever) punya page dalam fster. happen to cos she’s logged in.

tengok bahagian komen2 kengkawan die.

then dapat tau a shocking news. my heart beats so fast. i got teary a bit. i cant believe it.

my ex. he got himself engaged. i saw the pict.

hey, i wasnt sad. im just in shock. in awe? cant believe it.

called my gff, to ask her about it. she didnt pick up her hp.

call my bf to talk to him. i just need to talk to someone. he also didnt pick up his hp.

then i call hafiz (hambali). and i expresses what i felt.

i guess i havent forgive him. i …

there’s a lot of burning questions and there’s no answer.

maybe i dont need to ask why. maybe i just have to accept it.

i have to accept it. i have no choice.

after all this time, i still cant forgive him.

im so sorry, but i just cant.

Well, this morning started off with im damn lazy to wake up early at 5.45am so i ended up waking up 15 mins later

i had bfast, the usual home-made (yummy) coffee, my coffee and a slice of bread with peanut butter (hmmm..)

then i drove super fast to kiara. 140km/h. to break my monday of 120km/h record on the highway. i ended up arriving 15 mins earlier than monday record of 1 hr and 15mins. my home is in bandar bukit mahkota, 5 kms from nilai using the seremban highway. u do the math.

then, great and exciting (really?) experience taking notes and do reports (reportoire; nadia said the spelling is wrong, what the heck!) on first session. which was supposed to be ucapan aluan dato’ pi (pengarah intan) and ucapan perasmian ksn. but didnt happen. we knew 5 mins before 9am that ksn is not coming and someone else is taking over the first session. an economist from cimb research dept.

yes. economy. english.

we took notes rigourously. me and reduwan (rujuk fb sape mamat nih). dead serious. not a second to lose. but, somehow we couldnt really understand anything. not much anyway. we just… scribble away..

then we sit together and write our report. with our pp in charge, azura.

before that, i bought several books using my cc for rm120. and i actually (confess!) dont have any money left to spare on any other teeny-mainy stuff other than food.

great.

anyhow, it took us, wait let me count, 5 hours to complete the report.

its economy, remember.

and the presenter won awards. imagine how many technical jargons he used in his talk just now.

other pp praises (?) the fact that we manage to come out with a not-so-bad report in the end. of 8 pages.

a-ha (dead of expression way of saying; not the surprise one)

then went back home. singgah pasar malam before that. buy the usual roti john, my fave, i know you didnt know i like roti john right??

want to buy something else to. q up for it. well no so much as queue-ing but waiting behind some people. and waited a long time too as other makciks and pakciks and abangs are sooooooo horrible as to masuk je and ordered!

damn, im not so good in being blunt since working. m becoming more timid.

Emmy!!!

then, frustrated, i drove back home. in the very short journey to my home, called helmy. my dearest, helmy. ~sigh

ahhhh…. nasib baik mamat tu angkat hp. borak jap. hati cair. lupa marah. i tak pandai marah2 remember??!

terus baik semula mood…
~batting eyelashes~

anyhow, since then, i just online. and thats the story. today.

i need to write. no matter how tedious and pointless this post might seem. i need to start writing.

I am vigilant about writing. Again. Starting again. New light. New hope. New scene. New arena too.

Now why u may ask that i chose fster blog to write when instead i can choose others such as wordpress or blogspot?

Cos i have started from this arena. So i think i will just continue. No matter people read or not. It doesnt bother me much. As long as i write.

Wish me luck! Muaxxs

I want to remain in love.

Remember previously i have told you that our feelings towards another person can be controlled? And how you claimed disbelief towards my statement?

Well, i did take charge towards a feeling i had before towards someone. And the feeling is now gone. You did not quite believe it. You still believe that the feeling is still there and you try to encourage it to bloom. I can’t hardly blame you, although i was upset that you would pull your trick to me. That’s why i wrote ‘Things I Want To Say To You’. A blatant confessions of my feelings towards all the things accumulated.

Anyway, i was thinking, if i can and did control the feeling i had towards another, it means that i can control my feelings towards you right? That i can probably crush it into tiny meenie microscope specs and i wouldnt have to suffer more under your obvious ignorance!

But you know what? I don’t want to. Cos i feel great. To be having this feeling. To be in love? Should i call it that? Or just some idiotic crush as some would claim. A feeling that would ago away and will not withstand oceanus waves etc. I want to celebrate this feeling i have for you. I want to feel. I am lucky to be able to feel. Least of all towards you. You are like, the last person i would imagine myself to fall for! Its outrageously, unthinkably, unimaginably almost impossible, possible, had happened to me.

Do  you know how hard i tried to ignore, reject and pretend that it will go away, that it doesnt really exists, that all i am feeling is because i need someone, but to no avail? That it still remains and its still stuck in my heart and i am objectedly, having to lived with this feeling? Do you know how hard it is to remain as if nothing has changed when everything has changed? Or to pretend nothing has happened when its you i detect giving me ‘encouragement’ every now and then?

Your sms dated 15 Feb 2008 said: ‘Cinta mmg mcm tu.. Malu tp mahu kan, betul x?’ and the other very important: ‘Org yg mengalah ni mmg x dpt papela.. Buat keje biar habis mi.. Kalo x dpt pun puas hati.’ Do you know how i clung to the later sms to dear my dear life and believing it?

Uhh… I am pathetic. But i can’t help myself. Its an agony to be feeling this way but i am so happy. I am just.

I went to Genting last Sat. With a friend. A dear friend. It was an impulse thing. Which coincidently my dear friend agreed too. So i am so lucky dia ada with me this month. To accompany me. To make me forget. At least for a while. To lessen the heartache. To have fun!

We TRIED a lot of things. Took the chance to tried out the activities that i have been longing to do; like archery, go-kart, wall climb (my third time), going on the roller coaster and some more challenging; hormon-pumping activities.

The memorable ones are of course, archery. Why? Ummm cos it reminds me of Sidi. And i did it bcos i want to challenge him! Hahaha… It was fun. Me, being a competitor inside quickly msg him after that saying, ‘Kalau i dah terer nanti, kita lawan.’ Terus dia balas, ‘Hoho.. Berani u cbr i, wokeh, just set the time!’ I was smiling then. I am smiling now (Pathetic! i know) but i am still smiling…

About the go-karting thing, well i am kinda disappointed. Cos the car’s like, so damn slow… I was like, waiting for the ride to be over cos its so slow. Being a (usually) fast driver, i am disappointed. But then again, my friend said that its prob they have set the car to not able to move more than a limit. At some track, the car can move faster then the one at Genting. So yeah, that makes sense. Will def tried a diff one in the future.

I also have so much fun ‘dropping’ at this one ride. You know where there’s this very, very tall large pole and the bring the seats to the top and then all of a sudden drops? Oh my whole body was being lifted from the seat when we drop. I couldnt even scream! But yeah, that was awesome. Much better then the roller coaster; its called cork screw something, and the other flying roller coaster thing. So basically, every heart pumping ride, we tried.

I wanted to tried the gondola ride but well, i thought it will be romantic but then when i look at the path, the ‘made’ path, i changed my mind. It was so unromantic. I felt like my original plan to have a romantic picnic (with him!)at the secluded spot in Palace of the Golden Horse beside the lake thing is much more romantic. I can see the spot from the office you know. I just didnt a lot of money to persuade the people at the hotel to ‘lend’ me a spot. I siap beli tikar tok duduk berdua tu… Talk about planning… Ahh (sigh dreamily) imagining myself in a beautiful, pretty, sweet dress, having a picnic with him, overlooking the lake, with the beautiful scenery around us, that’s heaven!

Well, it didnt happen! Forget about it. Wall climbing! Yes, this is my third time trying. The first was when i was Form 5 i think. Victoria’s school was doing a Hari Terbuka, i think and one of the actitives they provided was wall climb. So i tried it. Made it to the top. Was so proud of myself. I can still hear my friends cheering me up. Those are some of the sweet memories.

What else happen at Genting eh? Hmm, yeah, we talk. A lot. It was raining a few times. Reallllyyyy cold. But i am happy. Only took a picture of me there. You know me, hate taking picts of myself. Feel like im not pretty in picts; yet i know that i am in real life (perasan, i know!). But that picts, as agreed by my dear friend tu, captured what i felt that day. Yeah. Will post the pict soon. As soon as my friend e-mail me the pict lar..

It was taken in a chocolate heaven, wonderland thingy.